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marco

May. 12th, 2008 01:32 pm Issue 518 Of ATI Zine.

Here's the newest issue of the zine, ATI.
Activist Times, Intentional.
If you want to get it formatted more accurately:
goto: http://www.etext.org/Zines/ and search for issue 518
or any other backissues you wish to grab.
cheers,
e&p.

----------------------------------------------

"What should be the length of the compressionist short story?
For the purist, somewhere around 1,000 words. Of course, this
is only a suggestion. But an image-driven story will always be
able to say more, and more importantly to imply more than a
non-compressionist story of similar wordage. We are not talking
poetry here. We are talking about a prose that reaches beyond poetry,
a prose that with luck reaches a third and fourth and even a fifth
dimension.

"What should be the ultimate goal of Compressionism? To produce work
that revitalizes the language; to have the works of compressionist
writers read by the many and studied in our halls of higher learning;
to ultimately have the very short story take its rightful place alongside
the poem, short story and novel as one of the great artistic forms of
literature."

[ref]=[http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewarticle.asp?AuthorID=49068&id=26191]

------------------------------------

Live, from some cave in the middle of the city in the
middle of the town inside of the county where the state
and the government squeeze it in, It's ATI!

All That's Ingestible.

_____ _ _
( _ ) (!)_ _ _ (!)_
| (_) | ___ | ,_)(_) _ _ (!) ___ | ,_)
| _ | /'___)| | | |( ) ( )| |/',__)| |
| | | |( (___ | |_ | || .._/ || |..__, ..| |_
(_) (_) .____)....__)(_)....___/'(_)(____/....__)
_____
(_ _)_
| | (_) ___ ___ __ ___
| | | |/' _ .. _ .... /'__..../',__)
| | | || ( ) ( ) |( ___/..__, ..
(_) (_)(_) (_) (_)....____)(518_/


5:02 PM 3/22/2008

7:52 AM 5/12/2008

9:07 PM 4/15/2008




's

http://www.gatt.org
http://www.etsy.com
http://3trillion.org
http://oldversion.com
http://www.timwise.org
http://www.submedia.tv
http://www.warez-bb.org
http://rockonthebook.com
http://www.peteseeger.net
http://angryjournalist.com
http://www.buyhandmade.org
http://trackingtransience.net
http://ashesandglass.blogspot.com
http://www.raven1.net/warathom.htm
http://www.climbingpoetree.com/live
http://www.voydofcourse.blogspot.com
http://www.joe-anybody.com/id104.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6ZAe9RV6XY
http://www.twofrog.com/flash/nokcarries7.html
http://blastfurnacetv.wordpress.com/2008/02/24/audio
http://www.icdc.com/~paulwolf/cointelpro/cointel.htm
http://www.phrack.org/issues.html?issue=65&id=13article
http://www.dylanchords.com/professors/dylans_guitars.htm
http://english.pravda.ru/photo/report/anorexic_models-3299/4
http://www.nativevillage.org/Editorials/toxic_trailers_and_smallpox_blan.htm
http://www.rollingstone.com/rockdaily/index.php/2007/09/11/frickes-picks-blackfire-pearl-jam-and-eyvind-kang


PUBLISHERS COLUMN


I was asked to comment about the Mascot issue
recently and figured I'd share the same thing
with you here.

[copy; paste]

the mascot is at the very roots of our racism.
it is the iconic representation of the very words
that get embedded into our thoughts as we belittle
fellow human beings who will share the planet with
us for a short time.

I get really hurt when I hear someone saying it's
not a very big thing.

Maybe because I've struggled so diligently to
recognize and remove sexism and racism from my
own language.

It's not just the words themselves. It's the logic
and actions behind and supporting them.

I wish I had an easier way to articulate this.

I've removed words like "rule of thumb" and "paddy wagon."

the thumb was a unit of measurement of where abuse
began in early american home husbandry. If you beat your
wife nearly to death with a switch that was narrower
than your own thumb, it was not abuse.
But if you even tapped her lightly with one that was
THICKER than your thumb, that was major abuse and you
could do jailtime.

The Paddy Wagon was the transport vehicle that racist
cops used to use when raiding an Irish Pub and they
would throw all the "Pattie's" into it no matter whether
they were drunk and disorderly or not. Pile up Irishpeople
the way you might fill a slaveship across the middle passage.

Most people think these words don't mean very much anymore.
The worst thing about it linguistically is that if I
say the cops beat me up and put me in a paddywagon, and
I don't even know the etymology of it, and neither do you,
you know exactly what I mean in plain english but once
again, we've both put out that racist energy underneath
our words for all the world to perpetuate.

If a college professor teaches me macro economics and he
suddenly says "general rule of thumb," thinking he only
means the current "definition one," of it, and I don't
call him on it, again, neither of us know the roots of
it, or anything, we both just transfer that first meaning
to each other, but we're putting out that underlying root
of racism parallel to what we're saying there.

Chief Wafrigginhoo or Illinoyance or whatever at a
ballgame does the same friggin thing.

And I often feel so alone tackling it because so many
people think it's not that crucial.

Even Lou Diamond Phillips who claimes to have been adopted
by Dine families AND Lakota families told a TV audience
"sometimes people take things too far" when asked about
the mascot issue.

Michelle Shocked was the musical guest that nite, and rather
than come out and talk she sang one song and left. She
mentioned that it was because he pissed her off so much
she was afraid that she had only bad words and would need
time to get good ones or else she couldn't talk publickly
or she would shame not just him but herself, her people and
the rest of all of us.

Good on her, and poopoo on Lou Diamond Phillips.

Again, mascots are at the very root of our racism.
We're swimming in it so we don't even recognize how
deep it is.

[/copy; paste]

OK.

So Pope Ratzinger personally apologized to five Ameri
can victims of his sexual holo-cost.

That gets much mileage toward understanding and truth.

Perhaps.

But two things must still be reckoned with before there will
EVER be real reconciliation.

And I don't want to go too hard on Ratzinger because not all
of it happened on his watch; but they are in order:

Columbus;
Hitler.

-30-


& LETTUCE




===========================
= info following brought =
= on by a need for more =
= real information =) =
===========================

Actors Strike Coming In July Maybe. Yay!!!
There's an actors' strike coming up.


Might start to ruin this fall's season, etc.


Um. Ruin what... bullcrap that doesn't come anywhere near
to the drama comedies and sitcoms and stuff from the 60s,
70s, 80s, etc?

Ruin that bullcrap???

Bring it on!

Maybe one of the "American" networks will get permission
to rebroadcast Canada's great sitcom "Little Mosque On
The Prairie."

Maybe they'll bring back some shows they'd killed off ONLY
for money reasons and not because the content or the acting
sucked or anything.


Maybe when they give the Actors what they ask for and THEN
come back on with a better contract in both directions,
we'll see better acting, better writing
and better directing.


Now wouldn't that be a hoot.


A reason to turn on television again?

Nah, doubt it, but there's your challenge.


Give us something besides horse shit to watch and maybe we'll
um,
er;
um...

watch.


Short Film Link

A few years back i did a show in vancouver and my friend spencer
estabrooks came over from victoria and hung out...after the show
i had a couple days off so i changed my flight and took the ferry
over to vancouver island...while we were crossing the strait i
asked spencer if we could shoot 'something' because i thought
it could be fun...so we woke up the next morning and this story
unfolded...

paste this link from youtube...it was 14 mins but he cut it down
to 7 mins...just an interesting story...davey rocks dude...
he's an angel...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23dAMc4pJ2Q




Convention Breaking Haiku

No reds or blues seen
There aren't any outside the
poet's window now.





Wanna see my favorite Interview Question of this millenium
so far?

Q: If you were stranded on a desert island (let's first
hope you have adequate food, water and shelter) and had
the ability to listen to just 5 albums, what would you pick?

YTW: The Bastard Fairies - Memento Mori (of course).
Then I would make my own best of compliations of the following artists
Tom Waits
Nick Cave
Charles Bukowski
And a copy of Ashlee Simpson's album just to remind me that if this
is acceptable listening to civilization then I am probably better
off being stranded on my own little island away from all that crap.


-30-



And another ATI Rhetorical Question. You ready?



Answering to what u wanna b when u grow up.

1) Motorpool supply Sergeant
2) 3rd shift convenience store clerk
3) Frycook
4) Lesbian Kiss cameraman for Playboy channel
5) Cult member
6) Cleanup crew leader at festival grounds
7) Air Force One PMCS mechanic
8) Similac salesman
9) Wash dumpsters for rerental
10)Manufacture Soy Lecithin and High Fructose for Nabisco




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< --E......3-- >
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............v............



WUSOW: Word's Underline Suggestion Of The Week.

profitization

did you mean? propitiation

runner up was "hackathon."
try walkathon?



And runnerup?



ee cummings

The squiggly lines tell you it doesn't like old ee at all.
Right clicking either of the lines gets you its suggestion.

eel comings






Urban Word of the Day
www.urbandictionary.com

March 27, 2008: twitterpated

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=twitterpated&defid=70633

1)to be completely enamored with someone/something.
2) the flighty exciting feeling you get when you think about/see
the object of your affection.
3) romantically excited (i.e.: aroused)
4) the ever increasing acceleration of heartbeat and body temperature
as a result of being engulfed amidst the exhilaration and joy of
being/having a romantic entity in someone's life.

When he smiled at her, the rush of warm, fuzzy, excited sensations
that filled her made her realize she was completely twitterpated
with this man.





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------------------------------------------------

And now, let's play a short game of "WHAT'S WRONG WITH
THIS SPAM." You ready?


Because you have to many wrong attemps on your Citibank
online banking, we had to put your account on hold.

Account Status: Temporary Blocked

We ask you to complete as soon as possible our security steps
which will reactivate your online banking.
To do this please follow the link bellow :

[LINK]

After this steps are complete you will be contacted by phone
in 3 days by a citibank representative.


---------

Did you see it right away?

The to=too typo might've gotten by an official mass email
by a company like Citibank but not the this=these one,
piled on top of the first one, and the overly awkward
sentence of "We ask you to complete..."

Those are most definitely English-As-A-Second-Language
issues that were NOT brushed up with spellcheck and NOT
brushed up with second, third or thinktank eyes.

And for extra credit:

The recipient of this spam has not had an account with Citi
since the 1980s.

------------------------------------------------




Today's WOW, Word Of The Week is molybdenum.






Here's lyrics to a song I'm absolutely wild about lately


I've got to save the world, liberate
Eat the food that's on my plate
Recycling is really great
Whatever I can do
To get in bed with you

I'll be a Marxist, a Communist
A pacifict, an anarchist, a Democrat
Red, white, green or blue
Whatever I can do
To get in bed with you

I never knew I gave a damn
Until you told me who I am
And what to do
Whatever I can do
To get in bed with you

'Cause I know war is bad and love is really good
Taking a stand starts in your neighbourhood
I do the best I can just like you say I should
The ones who make a difference are few
So what can I do
To get in bed with you

I'd love to hear your world peace plan
Why don't you tell me in my van
We can discuss Camus
Whatever I can do
To get in bed with you

I've got to change my mind, masticate
Use condoms when I fornicate
Until I hyperventilate
Whatever I can do
Your balls are turning blue

I've got to save the world, liberate
Eat the food that's on my plate
Recycling is really great
Whatever I can do
To get in bed with you

What I can do
To get in bed with you
What I can do
To get in bed with you

[ref]=[http://www.lyricstime.com/the-bastard-fairies-whatever-lyrics.html]


---___---___---___---___---___---___---
CLOSINGTHESOACLOSINGTHESOACLOSINGTHESOA
---___---___---___---___---___---___---


AND NOW THE BEST SPAM I'VE GOTTEN THIS MILLENIUM.

Hi,

It's been a tasking job enforcing the peace here. The insurgents
are buoyed by help from Iran & Syria to undermine what we have
achieved here. I have interesting piece of news which will really
blow your mind.

My platoon were deployed here near Tikrit Saturday @ 1900hrs
as a call had come about insurgent activity 20miles south on
the outskirts of Tikrit. Intel from insiders in Tikrit had it
that they were taking a delivery of arms from Iran.

We had to intercept, engage & control the situation. We could
call in air support if the need arose. We sighted and engaged
@ 2200hrs in a village SW of Tikrit. On perceiving our presence,
they first opened fire on us. We had to engage fully. It took
a while (30mins) but we outgunned them massively. Finally, we
brought the situation under control and some of them fled, 6
were killed and we were able to arrest 11 of them alive.

On the way back to our base in Tikrit, another call that
required urgent attention needed that we should block some
groups insurgents destroying lives and properties very far
way in Nasariya. We got there & rained peace within the city
and community after several hours of battle against the insurgents.

As the fight was going on, I had to take cover and shield in
a very thick forest. It was here I saw a trunk box and quickly
used my sword to make hole in the ground and buried the box.
The next day was Sunday and after devotional service, I went
there on a disguised to check the content in the box and fortunately
the box contained stash of $100 bills which I counted them and it
all amounted $4.3M. Right now I am still surprised how this box
of money got there and who must have kept it in the forest.

In fact I could sense it might be a fellow soldier who must
have hid the box in that forest because before I was deployed
here last year, I heard and read in the news there were some
soldiers who discovered lot of funds in Baghdad in the 2003.
Even five soldiers were questioned for some missing funds.

I had to start my research to confirm the news of the
discovered money in Iraq, I now became convinced through
the proof of the under listed websites that actually so
many funds were discovered here in April 2003.

http://www.jonathanforeman.com/military/nyp_iraq/04192003_chest.html
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2988455.stm

I believed my fellow airborne might be responsible for the
box in the forest probably after doing that he died in the war
because so many of us have lost their lives to the Iraqi insurgent.
You can verify that from this links;

http://cryptome.org/mil-dead-iqw.htm
http://icasualties.org/oif/us_names.aspx



One passionate appeal I will make is you must not discuss
this matter with anybody, if you have any reason to reject
this offer, please destroy this message as any leakage of
this information will be too bad for a U.S soldier here in Iraq.


I do not know how long we will remain here, and I have been shot,
wounded and survived two suicide bomb attacks by the special
grace of God that survived me.

This was quite an illegal thing to do, but I tell you what? No
compensation can make up for the risk we have taken with our lives
in this hell hole. You can imagine my brother in-law was
killed by a road side bomb few days back.


My questions now are;

1. Can you handle this project?
2. Can I give you the trust?
3. Can you keep this business very confidential?
4. If you can finance this project, is 30% acceptable by you,
as your commission?

If you are interested in carrying out this deal with me, reply
so that we can plan the means to move out the funds out from here.

Regards,
Sgt. Richard L. Zeppieri, U.S Army


---------------------------------
ACTIVIST issue 518 wowza
TIMES 518 have we
INC got this far???
---------------------------------








Here's a poem:

Another New London

by Marco Frucht

The fo[u]rth time I left Konetiuk
I just knew I will (re)visit/(re)turn
yet again.

No schooner had I, brought me back
When no train would bri[n]g me home.

'Twas PDX to PVD via Southwest

Turned my whole life around
back to the rusty Thames
to the Sound
to the old shopworn potato[e] fields
to the sea
and to my own heart

Moosup - (April 2008)



-30-



nonlinear thought of the millenium.

u.s. tells mexico prez calderon all "illegals" are
free to come into the u.s. as long as they carry
1 barrel of oil with them.



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http://www.GodlessFortBenning.com

?

!

:)



BITTER NEWS:


Angry Journalist 4122:

I am angry because of my love/hate relationship
with technology. I lost 5 innings of a softball
game due to a corrupted CF card.

[ref]=[http://angryjournalist.com]




Part of a poem for Shadia:

...Give me a quick, dark and ancient death.
Cold obsidian with no K-Y jelly,
slid roughly into the heart like rabid Israeli bulldozers
snarling unto Palestine.
Sand Creek plagiarized and mechanized.

from Adrian C Louis' poem "Witch Wind"
in his book "Evil Corn."

http://www.snreview.org/0405Louis.html






"If I were pushing one particular candidate, I would say 'yes we can.'"

-- Rev. Jeremiah Wright 27apr08




Remembering Leonard Peltier.

Wow, thanks Vicky.
I remember that evening far too well.
Leonard Peltier was confirmed to be on Clinton's
short list of people he was in fact going to pardon.

It was about 5pm.

I was working my normal volunteer job at Indymedia that
takes every extra hour I have in my life the past 9 years
or so.

CNN reported on their TV channel and on their webpage
that Peltier was on the pardon list.

Then they removed it from TV but it was still on the
webpage. I called CNN and was connected with the woman
who was handling that story. I've forgotten her name but
have it written down somewhere I know. She said they could
not confirm that he was on that list. I asked her how come
then they had run with it as an official CNN story.

She insisted it wasn't on the webpage OR the TV's sidescroll.
I told her it was removed from the TV but still on their
website.

She said if it ever WAS on the website OR tv that it was
gone now and that no one in their entire agency ever reported
that he was ever on that list. I told her she was wrong
and asked her why people above her were lying to the
American people. She told me our conversation was over,
and firmly but politely hung up the phone.

I went back to the website and it was gone.

A couple hours later Clinton gave his list and Peltier
was not on it.

Earlier that day, or the day before about 300 members of
the FBI had marched on the White House and were allowed
in for a "personal" private meeting with him. They were
bragging on the freerepublic websites that they were
demanding Peltier be removed from that short list.

I remember that moment like it was yesterday.




We end this edition with a Michelle St. John poem.

It became the ending song to "Business Of Fancydancing."


Who are you when you turn your back?
Where do you go when you leave here?
You can't hide from your truth
Can't run from where you belong

Some things you can't choose
Sometimes you can't have it all
I know your dreams remind you
Where you belong

Memories hold you tight
When there's no comfort in white arms
Loneliness will bring you back
Where you belong

--Michelle St. John





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Call (516)922-wine it's still up!!!
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You'll notice that http://www.thepentagon.com/primeanarchist

http://www.thepentagon.com/protesting , singing, podcasting

Went down after all these years...

bummer. sad to see it go.





Shouts and greets to The Bastard Fairies

And this issue is dedicated to YOU



/a..
//T....
// ....
// ....
//(((i)))....
//_________....




(A)(C)(T)(I)(V)(I)(S)(T) (T)(I)(M)(E)(S)


-30-



99

Leave a comment

May. 9th, 2008 08:01 am The FBI Raids Tommy Chong... Again... for his DVDs!

http://www.local12.com/news/local/story.aspx?content_id=06471fa4-66f2-4ffe-8ddf-8c7630326bad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmB-qKzliYc

http://www.akatommychong.com

This is insane, and if you look at Bush's speech coming up in a few
minutes reporting that marijuana leads to brain damage and liberalism,
as well as the press eating up all this newly "dusted off" Reefer Madness
bullshit, you can see what's happening here.

No I'm not going to call it a conspiracy.
It's an orchestrated spin campaign
right out of the White House war room and the corporate media is just
doing whatever they're told.


It's ugly and demonic and wrong.


Free Tommy Chong the occasional marijuana user
and jail George W. Bush who has a flattened nose
from all the cocaine he's clearly still using!

Now!

2 comments - Leave a comment

Apr. 20th, 2008 11:34 am Celebrity Morph by MyHeritage

1 comment - Leave a comment

Apr. 17th, 2008 07:47 am A Better Debate Idea

I have a better debate idea.

How about Hillary and Barak each pick unidentifyable nicknames
and join a forum with about 20 of us from around the country doing
likewise.

We rock and roll and spew the typical ad hominems and bullsh|t at
each other that we all seem to do in forums, along with the higher
issue-tackling which seems to come along within it as well.

Then at the end of some allotted time period we all "unmask" ourselves
by linking nickname back up with real name and we then allow the
pundits to go absolutely crazy on the "he said" "she said" bulldada
that they're best known for.

Then we'll really get to the deep down and dirty of it all, won't we?

cheers,
marco

Leave a comment

Feb. 25th, 2008 03:05 pm VISTA: 10 Things I Hate About You

Vistannoyances
by marco

1) Startup takes forever.

2) Shutdown, even right from a startup gives a "general fault" type error.

3) RECLAIM FILETYPES - freeamp/zinf mp3player needs you to put "reclaim filetypes every single time you
open it up. The built-in Windows MediaPlayer overrides it and makes itself the default no matter
what. Every time. EVEN AFTER telling it it's NOT the default.

4) FREEZE-UPS - ctrl alt del takes about as long to get to as every other program during a freeze-up

5) Just opening Firefox with 2 tabs, Opera with 5 and checking email at the same time uses all 2G RAM???

6) If you inadvertantly leave a music disc in your CDRW/DVDRW don't even think about opening a
few different applications.

7) I don't need 301 fonts built-in totalling 160+ MB.

8) In the end I didn't really like prefetch. What made them think I'm going to like Superfetch??

9) I bet I'm going to hate the newest version of indexed searching too. I don't even want to look.

10) Why does search NOT default to showing you the filesizes? And I just tried to add FILESIZE as
a button and now I'm frozen up on that, notepad, opera, and two directories opened.

(In fact I'm retyping this in notepad on my xppro laptop right now while reading it off my PC's
LCD screen beause VISTA's locked-up "hourglassing" before I had a chance to save the last 6 items
I "hate." How surreal and postmodern is that???)

This is NOT the top 10 personal problems. It is literally the first 10 I found a few days out of
the box. I have a factory installed version of Vista on a machine that can handle it. Don't get
me started on the things I found the next few days while trying to put XP on this thing with their
"easy to use" partition shrinking application before deciding to just keep Vista in its current
state on the harddrive which I'll just tuckaway for a while and then install a new SATA drive for
a clean XP Pro install.

I'm typing this in notepad.exe and even THAT is fighting with my global search of 1627 factory
installed .GIFs



But wait, there's more.

The OS takes up 14+ GB memory on the harddrive, plus a 9G partition for restoring
since they don't trust the end user with serial # and install disks anymore!

Ummm. what if there's one little bad sector in the OS with another in the restore???
Or worse yet, a complete harddrive hardware failure?

And why is the first 300MB of my 2G RAM seemingly nonexistant? No, I don't mean
already used up in taskmanager, it's hidden from view!!!

It took me 3 weeks to hunt down drivers for an XP "downgrade" on this machine.
But I finally did it. I'm running XPPro SP2 on one harddrive and Ubuntu 7.10
on the other. Each is about 10 times faster than the Vista factory install,
boots up in about a minute and a half, and lets you power down without any
Fatal Errors or anything.

I'll stop here. I could go on for decades. I think Vista needs to get back
to me at Service Pack 3 or so, because I'm not even in the mood to try SP1,
ok? This was a nightmare, of epic proportions, let me tell you. So let me
just say, I didn't like VISTA when it first got discussed, as Longhorn, etc.,
and I wasn't planning on running it ever, but I did this on a brand new
machine just to see "up front and personal" what everyone's complaining
about. And boyeeee were they right.

Leave a comment

Jan. 15th, 2008 01:05 am

I'm watching Kimya not guesting on the Conan show.

What a profound sacrifice to deny yourself that opportunity.
I really want to believe I too would refuse to cross a picket
line even if someone like Conan said "hey come on my show..."

The last time I watched an entire Conan was when my friend
Stubhy's band had just been signed to Elektra. It was a
huge shot in the arm for them.

The only other time I watched a whole Conan was when he
and Michael Moore had that argument out the window when
the studio had banned Moore.

I half expected Conan to try and go outside and film Kimya
singing to the strikers with a cheap Nikon Coolpix or something.

I think years ago he woulda risked that. Instead he's telling
cheap jabs about the Golden Globes and otherwise not touching
the writers' strike topically at all.

No Lenny Bruce he!!!

Current Mood: crushed

Leave a comment

Jan. 10th, 2008 11:50 pm 'nother new website.

http://www.IWriteMoreThanYou.com


:)

Leave a comment

Aug. 5th, 2007 09:55 pm michelle madigan outed at defcon 15 hackercon




Michelle Madigan was outed at Defcon 15 trying
to use a pinhole camera "to catch a hacker."

Shame on NBC, Shame on the Corporate Media.

I wonder if this story would've run on both NBC
and MSNBC for the next 5 years as if it's brand
new, the same way "crack addicted teen mothers
from Portland" or some of the others are running.


cheers,
marco


[ref]=[http://tailrank.com/2358476/Undercover-NBC-Dateline-reporter-bolts-from-DEFCON-2007]

2 comments - Leave a comment

Apr. 24th, 2007 09:57 pm My Analogy For What General David Petraeus Faces

When I first arrived at Fort Carson Colorado with the
Signal Corps, the mountain we were guarding was in
great turmoil.

A team of IT specialists had just told the Pentagon
that there was no way they were going to be able to
network all of the various rooms of computers deep
inside NORAD mountain as they sat.

Their recommendation after 3 years research was that
they farm down all the different kinds of PCs to the
National Guard groups; then install all of any one kind
of computer and then network them.

It was going to involve about one hour of downtime,
or perhaps two half hour outages each for half the
mountain.

The Pentagon paid them their most recent paycheck
and SUMMARILY FIRED THE ENTIRE TEAM.

A new team of IT specialists had just arrived and
were given two years to look over the earlier group's
three years work and make a recommendation.

I overheard two of these geeks discussing how they
were going to find a way to say the exact same thing
the first group said, but say it in a way that they
won't get fired.

So how does this relate to the 4 1/2 star General?




Petraeus is new to heading up the warring on Iraq.

Half a dozen Generals before him have each told Bush
privately that the war cannot be won militarily.

THEY GOT FIRED LIKE SO MANY OTHER PEOPLE WORKING
"AT THE PLEASURE," EACH OF THEM.

Petraeus now faces the prospect of figuring out how
the hell he's going to tell Mr. Bush, "this war cannot
be won militarily," without getting fired.

Maybe he should call Donald Trump.

Or Don Imus?

Current Mood: contemplative

4 comments - Leave a comment

Apr. 19th, 2007 08:55 am Opinion: So Many Have Botched This School Shooting

I think the press has been handling the Virginia Tech
school shooting even worse than the school administration
did.

But it's difficult to tell at this point how much isn't the
press AND the admin intertwined trying (and not succeeding)
to control things and thereby covering up here and there.

That is unfortunate.

Lastly, I feel that when NBC received this package they should've
found a way to get every single word (TEXT ONLY RATHER THAN FOTOS
AND VIDEOS)[*] of the manifesto to the american people without
sensationalizing things. Most especially because he mentions
Columbine in it. Tomorrow is Hitler's birthday.

I feel that law enforcement, media and school administration
have further endangered all of us in the united states by
their attempts to manage this.
___________________________________

[*] CLARIFICATION:

I wasn't clear enough [need coffee!] in that I wish TEXT of the
manifesto would have been released to the full open source community.
We could've been left out of the loop on video and images for days
if not longer even. Let law enforcement glean what they can out of
all that additional crap. We need the words. WE NEED TO KNOW IF THERE'S
A SECOND SHOOTER WANDERING AROUND PLANNING OTHER STUFF. WE NEED TO
KNOW RIGHT AWAY AND FIGURE OUT ON OUR OWN maybe that this creep isn't
in the Trench Coat Mafia or the Hammerskins or anything. We need to
know that other schools and towns, are safe if they are. Etc.

NBC dropped the ball on this, so did admin and so did law enforcement.

http://www.planetblacksburg.com/2007/04/botched_press_conference_leaves_virginia_tech_apol.php

http://mke.indymedia.org/en/2007/04/207244.shtml

Current Mood: annoyed

Leave a comment

Apr. 17th, 2007 11:29 am feeling antisoc today.

feeling antisoc! just want to walk around listening to iPod hiding in my blue hoody all day


My newest zine went out yesterday:

http://shrinkster.com/o22

I've also been blogging a lot at:
http://www.muffinbottoms.org as well.

cheers,
marco

Leave a comment

Apr. 16th, 2007 04:33 pm Hey Corporate Media, Calm Down!!!

Open Letter To Corporate Media:
This Is NOT The Largest Mass Shooting In U.S. History.

Look Up Wounded Knee. Dolts!


----------------------------------------------




The corporate media went from calling today's school shooting
the worst campus shooting, to the worst shooting in amerikan
history.

um.


um...


"When the smoke cleared and the shooting stopped, approximately 300 Sioux were dead, Big Foot among them."

http://www.eyewitnesstohistory.com/knee.htm


I guess 32 college students is a whole lot worse than....

I'm not even going to friggin say it.

KNOCK IT OFF CORPORATE MEDIA. YOU ARE AS MUCH THE PROBLEM
AS THE SHOOTERS THEMSELVES!!!



--------------------------------


And lastly, a guy named Bryce is blogging his feelings
during and after this shooting on campus:

http://ntcoolfool.livejournal.com

3 comments - Leave a comment

Apr. 9th, 2007 08:20 pm New issue of zine out. #496

brand new issue of the zine ATI is out.


http://shrinkster.com/nrh

or

http://www.etext.org/Zines/ASCII/ATI/ati496.txt



Enjoy!

Leave a comment

Apr. 8th, 2007 08:01 pm Happy Easter. Please Watch My New Bunny Movie.

Hi all, happy easter.

Enjoy this movie please.




http://youtube.com/watch?v=VzA1YUtmAEE


:)


oh ps: last place I posted this, someone yelled at me
for not mentioning that it's not quite office friendly.

So keep that in mind.

cheers.

Leave a comment

Apr. 7th, 2007 08:23 pm Karl Rove's Got Some Humps




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2O37x_Gm1k

Leave a comment

Apr. 7th, 2007 08:50 am Why The *&^% Am I Defending Don Imus???

"Are you naked?" was Imus in the Morning's favorite
prank to pull during the WNBC radio days in the 70s.
He would call a random housewife in the tri-state area
and interview her about all kinds of things. Some mundane,
some exciting, and then "blammo!" He'd ask her what she's
wearing.

Now you see why I think Howard Stern is very unoriginal.

I was a big fan of Imus back then. I was a teenager and
a monthly purchaser of Playboy magazine with my allowance,
etc. It took many years to figure out that he was rather
sexist, a tiny bit racist and a WHOLE FRIGGIN LOT CLASSIST.

I think it dawned on me when Fairfield County Connecticut
appointed him harbourmaster, which seems like a silly post
but apparently it carries a lot of local power.

It was some kind of back room deal in talking him out of
running for mayor of something like Bridgeport or Stamford
or something. I think it had to do with rumors that he
was pro-Klan or attended a racist fraternity in college
or something. But anyhow. NBC fired him so often, it became
part of his ratings game plan so fans never knew what he
was going to say to get him fired again. He played that
for what it was worth until it didn't seem to mean much
anymore.

So now the Chicago Tribune, the NAACP and a whole bunch
of other prominent people want MSNBC to fire him, but
the network is going to try to ignore all requests.
They claim they'll monitor his show more.

Now, here's my opinion. And I'm reserving full judgement
til I've heard the entire thing in full context. So far
I'm aware that Imus used two controversial words. (I've
seen part of the footage in a narrow context spun by the
corporate media on my television)

He called members of a girls basketball team "nappy headed"
and he called them "hos."

That's idiotic but it's not racist. I've had to tolerate
a LOT of black friends for using those expressions against
women I know and women I don't know. I've spoken up and
gotten my head bitten off. I'd be willing to tell Don Imus
to his face he's a first class jerk for calling these
women that, but I'm not going to try and over extend the
defition of hate or racism to include what he said. It's
an unfinished dialog what white people can say and what
black people can say, etc. Til Sean Puffy Combover is
willing to stop using words like "nappy head" and "ho"
I'm not going to make Imus stop saying it. What's next,
forbidding white people from asking each other or anyone
else "what's up?"

Now one of his cohosts on the other hand, said the word
"jigaboo." That's beyond racist. I don't know where to
begin I'm so pissed off.

Anyhow. That's who should be fired. And Imus should be
verbally assaulted for NOT verbally assaulting the
openly racist guy's remarks right there on our televisions.

OK, strike the words "verbal" and "assault" and put
reprimanded or something.

So why on earth am I defending Imus? I'm still a fan,
I still don't like him personally (yes I've met him)
but I do like his work. Sticky point I know. Anyhew,
I'll get to the point and close this saying, I think
Imus is probably racist deep down inside, because it
seems to seep out his pores, and I've heard some "coded
language," that comes close, but I've yet to hear him
actually say something racist directly.

That's my 23 and a half cents or so.

Oh, in answer to my "why am I def..."

Well, gosh, I don't know. Somebody's gotta do it, I guess.

http://www.twittering.org
http://www.makingyoutubes.org

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Jan. 22nd, 2007 03:36 am My Pet Goat Plane Crash

Reading the book "My Pet Goat" while planes crash.





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tqcxo7E0YRQ

Leave a comment

Nov. 28th, 2006 01:19 am 15th Day In Oaxaca - An Anonymous Report

As always, I am here as a witness of the events here in Oaxaca. The real
struggle, the real risks, and the real revolution is with the people of
Oaxaca.

Monday, November 27

So overnight I woke up every few hours to listen to the livestream of Radio
Universidad, and it continued to transmit. Just before 6 am I woke up to
hear the last few bars of "Venceremos" then the Radio stopped transmitting,
and there was only the background interminable march music that is
broadcasted by Radio enemies to interfere with the signal. I freaked,
thinking that the attack had happened, they had played one last song, and it
was over. Then I realized they were taking the required several hour break
from radio transmissions. Phew.

In the morning people gathered for the march from the University to the
Santo Domingo plaza. We weren't able to go because it seemed unsafe to
travel there. Police were traveling around the University neighborhood,
searching people, checking their ID, and detaining some. At about 10 am a
message came through the radio that 300 people had gathered, and they needed
more Oaxaquenos for the march. We hoped to meet the march part-way on their
route, and continue on to Santo Domingo. Then we heard that the PFPs had
taken over the Santo Domingo plaza, to prevent APPO and other organizations
from re-establishing their encampment there, and that there were military
and police at the nearby Juarez park, possibly blocking people from creating
another planton there. The march was suspended, I suspect for security
reasons.

We walked towards Santo Domingo, to see what was going on there.There were
PFPs stationed at each of the entrances. The entire plaza had been scoured
and cleaned. On the night of November 25, after hours of street battle, the
police gathered and burned all the tarps and materials left by movement
people in the Santo Domingo planton. Then on the 26th all the garbage was
picked up, and all the graffiti painted over. It was as if there never was
an emcampment there, which I would guess was the idea.

Throughout the day we heard about more police aggressions and detentions. A
truck near the airport was stopped, and the driver shot. Police are taking
people from their houses and taking them away. There are persistent rumors
of mass graves outside of Oaxaca City, though no one has definite proof.

We also get updates on November 25. According to the latest information
there have been 6 confirmed deaths, though we also have heard that PFPs were
bragging that they had killed at least 13 and disappeared the bodies. There
was a shooting late at night at the Facultad de Medicine (the medical
school) where many people had sought refuge. As they left URO-supporters
opened fire, killing at least 3 and wounding many.

The situation is very tense. Danger seems to be everywhere -- from the
federal police, from the AFI (Mexican's Federal Investigators), from
paramilitaries (who may be police in civilian clothes, or PRI party
supporters), from the outspoken PRI party supporters. The PRI-istas have a
radio station, and they have broadcasted the addresses of movement
supporters, most likely to guide their night-time squads. As we sit here, we
hear occasional gunshots in the distance.

And tonight there is word that the university attack is again imminent. One
US friend who was there was told directly to leave, because it would be too
dangerous. This is in direct contrast to other nights, when the
barricadistas wanted us to stay.

It is almost impossible for me to hear the Radio Universidad over the
internet. The interference is too strong.

In this time, while trying to listen to the radio, I would like to share
some of my experiences at the Radio Universidad encampment. And if there are
any urgent updates from the radio, as far as I can hear, I will, of course,
mention them.

My dear, dear friends at the Radio Universidad. Although I have only known
them for 2 weeks, they are in my heart. Quite honestly, I feel unworthy of
their esteem and affection. When I saw them on the street late on the night
of November 25, after hours of street battlees, they called out "Doctora
Elena! Como estas? Donde has estado? Venga con nosotros a la universidad!"
(Doctor Elena! How are you? Where have you been? Come with us to the
university!).

I wonder, why do they want to fight? For an ideal? A political or social
vision? The image of themselves as revolutionaries? For the valor? For the
battle scars and stories they could share with friends in the future, if
they survive? Because in this society they have nothing else to live for?
(reminds me of young people in poor neighborhoods of the US who chose to
sell drugs or join gangs because they see no other viable alternative, and
because they see no other positive future) Impossible to know, of course,
though I suspect in many it is a messy mix of these, and other factors.

While at Radio Universidad I talked a lot with a man I will call Che, who
seemed to be one of the most reliable and responsible of the barricadistas
there. He is also a self-styled revolutionary fighter. He is enormously
charismatic, dependable and a bit crazy. He states, unequivocally, that he
is willing to die for this struggle. Is it worth it? Can I stand to see his
vibrant, powerful life snuffed out for this struggle? And who the hell am I
to ask? He knows what may come, and he continues to organize, and to fight.

I have worked a lot with Che. If you ask him to get something done, from my
experience, it gets done. One day one of the first aid station workers asked
him to bring more water, because the first aid station was almost out of
drinkable water. None appeared for a long time, and I thought he had
forgotten. But it turned out there was no drinkable water in the Radio
Universidad compound. Che told people at the first aid station, "As soon as
there is water, I will bring you some." They made a call over the Radio for
more water from the community, and a bit later there were 10+ large (5
gallon) bottles, and many smaller bottles filled with filtered water. A bit
later Che appeared, carrying a 80 pound bottle of water on his shoulder, and
within hours there were many more gallons of water at the first aid station.


Che is a complicated mix of self-promotion and genuine commitment. He loves
to have photos taken of him, in a face mask, with a bazooka, in front of the
graffiti saying "Hasta la victoria siempre" upon his insistence. He wears
all black, with a bullet proof vest at times. He strides around the
encampment, checking in with different people, and talking about the most
recent developments. He seems to have the genuine respect of the other
barricadistas at Radio Universidad. How much of this is cult of personality,
and how essential is charisma to revolutionary "leaders" (because I think he
would disavow the label of leader, if asked)?

I write at length about Che, because he is one of the most obvious
organizers at the Radio.

It is impossible not to feel utterly trite and overly romantic about the
people in this movement. We tend to romanticize revolutionary workers. But
there is some truth in this hyperbole. Many people in the Oaxaca movement
have moved beyond their own day-to-day concerns, and fight tirelessly for a
greater cause.

La Doctora Berta, for example. She is a grand personality, with one part
absolute commitment, one part political insight, one part calm
determination, one part intense focus on the struggle at hand, and one part
self-abnegation and humor. She has worked tirelessly for this movement,
continuing to attend strategy meetings and negotiations, announce in her
calm and witty style over the radio, and attend to patients in the first aid
station, despite total exhaustion, sickness (a very bad cough after being
tear-gassed in the ambulance during the march on November 20, "But it cured
my sinusitis!" she said.) and threats to burn her house and kill her and her
family.

One day, while I was in the first aid station and she was resting after
becoming quite sick from the tear gas. I had just begged her to take more
time to rest, to take care of herself. We were listening to the radio. "What
are they doing, playing music?" she said. "We must talk about the situation.
We must rally the people." and she jumped from her bed, and went to the
radio, to announce for the next hour.

She can also be quite severe, and as a result has alienated some of the
barricadistas at the Radio Universidad. How much of her intensity and, at
times, authoritarianism, is a result of 6 months of fighting, and how much
intrinsic to her personality? I will never know, because I am only here now.
But she is one of the absolute essential elements of this movement. She
calls the people, and they respond. She is calm in the face of crisis, and
helps all of us face whatever is coming (and I must mention that I face
literally no danger or repression in comparison to Oaxacan and Mexican
citizens) with "a burning heart and a cold mind."

Right now the radio continues to transmit. We just heard what sounds like a
tear gas explosion in the distance.

For now, I will sign off. Please keep the people of Oaxaca, and all those
struggling for justice, in your hearts.

Cuidense,
Xochitl


get these emails directly from:

cuidense@gmail.com

also, an archive spot is:

http://www.etext.org/Zines/ASCII/ATI/columns/DaysInOaxaca

Leave a comment

Sep. 28th, 2006 07:48 pm Journalist Complains About Censorship; Gets Fired

my friend brenda complained to her bosses at ICT
(Indian Country Today) about censorship and now
their response was to terminate her position.
yuck.


You'll remember Brenda Norrell for her research about
Black Mesa Arizona, Chiapas, and all kinds of other
really important issues. Well because of her bosses,
often times we've only gotten about half the story
and sometimes none of the story!

http://www.indiancountry.com/author.cfm?id=448

She complained each time she got censored, and tried
to blog as much as she could at places like the UN
Observer, other indigenous oriented newspapers, and
even at her own blog.

http://bsnorrell.tripod.com
http://www.why-war.com/news/author.php?name=Brenda+Norrell
http://www.google.com/search?client=opera&rls=en&q=brenda+norrell&sourceid=opera&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8




Censorship, the other genocide, killing of the spirit

Hello,
I was just terminated by Indian Country Today. Since I began this
effort as a news reporter in Indian country 23 years ago in pursuit of
justice and truth, I feel I owe the readers an apology for allowing ICT
to censor the truth in articles I have written. I did protest the
censorship, but no retractions were published.
Officially, my position is being eliminated on Friday. This comes
after I repeatedly complained of censorship at the newspaper. During
the past month these issues were censored:
--Censored: After all reporters were told to write about the bird flu,
I wrote about how Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld is profiteering by
millions from the sale of the drug Tamiflu, receiving profits from a
company where he holds shares. The article included information on the
earlier attempts of companies to profiteer from the sale of ribavirin
during the Navajo hantavirus outbreak. My article was censored in ICT
and turned into an advertisement for the medication Tamiflu.
--Raytheon Missiles on Navajo farm (NAPI) in the recent NAPI/Cuban
contract story; I was told not to include in the article the fact that
Raytheon is located on the Navajo farm and is responsible for spills
leading to cancer in South Tucson, where Chicanos and Indians live.
Raytheon produces missiles for the Department of Defense.
--Tohono O'odham teen ran over by Border Patrol, recent visit to the
site of Bennett Patricio Jr.'s death with Amnesty International; we
were followed by undercover agents on tribal land
Also, these are some of the articles censored since 2004:
--The fact that Ben "Nighthorse" Campbell is Portuguese and grew up in
California. His mother is full-blooded Portuguese and his story changed
about his father through the years. One Northern Cheyenne medicine man
asked ICT who Campbell is. Campbell first claimed to have some Apache
blood and later changed it Northern Cheyenne. The Denver Post reported
that Campbell is at least 7/8th non-Indian. Campbell did not respond
for a request to comment.
--Louise Benally of Big Mountain, comments comparing the Long Walk and
imprisonment in Bosque Redondo to the atrocities in Iraq (this deleted
from a published article)
--Denial of prison rights to Leonard Peltier in an article on Indian
prison rights
--The Montana governor's criticisms of the war in Iraq during his
formal address at NCAI's annual convention in 2005
--The handcuffing of Tohono O'odham Ofelia Rivas and attempts to
silence her by a non-Indian police officer of the Tohono O'odham Nation
--Comments by Bahe Katenay of Big Mountain on how the Navajo sacred
place of Creation in Dinetah, near Bloomfield, NM, in the Four Corners
area, is inundated with oil and gas wells and pollution from the power
plants on tribal land.
The ongoing censorship is a violation of the public trust.
This is the second time I've been terminated at ICT since the
newspaper was purchased by the Oneida Nation. I was already in
bankruptcy because of the first time they terminated me in 2001 (for
refusing to relocate, even though no male reporters were required to
relocate.)
To my knowledge, all female reporters who have not resigned have been
terminated. To my knowledge, none of the male reporters have ever been
terminated since the Oneida Nation purchased the newspaper.
However, the bigger issue is censorship. The censoring of vital
issues reflects what news reporters are enduring all over America. They
are forced into silence because of the necessity of work. However,
since ICT/Oneida Nation has already forced me into bankruptcy, I can
share a little of the truth. One of those truths is that Indian gaming,
at times, offers the illusion of wealth.
There are two Indian editors that deserve a great deal of praise for
what they have done over the past decades, Navajo Times managing editor
Duane Beyal and Indian Country Today founder, Lakota Tim Giago.
During the many years I worked for these two editors, I was never
censored.
When other publications refused to publish voices of Indian people
opposing the war in Iraq, the Navajo Times published those. When other
publications censored an article on Indians targeted by police in South
Dakota, Lakota Journal published it.
Those are just two examples. Both Beyal and Giago have championed the
pursuit of truth and never attempted to censor Indian peoples' voices.
I hope all Indian people will put pressure on Indian Country Today
concerning the censorship. There is a select agenda being published in
the name of "Indian Country," which does more to advance the interests
of the Oneida Nation and Indian gaming.
At ICT, I was repeatedly told to halt writing articles about
"grassroots people and the genocide of American Indians," by one of the
non-Indian managing editors.
Also, I hope people will question ICT hiring non-Indian managing
editors with no prior experience in Indian issues or Indian country,
and little experience in journalism. The managing editors are the ones
actually in the New York ICT office, chosing content and putting the
paper out. For years there has been a series of non-Indian managing
editors with no prior experience in Indian country. The censorship and
errors have increased.
It is easy to look at ICT and see what the agenda is and what is being
censored. There's certainly no articles on Leonard Peltier or how
Arizona Indian tribal members are living in poverty while the casino
gaming management makes a fortune. (One Tohono O'odham casino manager
made $800,000, according to a recent mainstream news article.)
Of course, I will continue to write for other Indian media, provide
information to radio stations and write for the UN Observer and
International Report at the Hague.
It is sad that at such a crucial time, while so many reporters are
being censored by corporations and the Bush administration, that Indian
Country Today has taken all of these extreme acts of censorship.
This censorship of Indian voices constitutes another form of genocide,
a killing of the spirit of the people.

Best, Brenda Norrell



http://milwaukee.indymedia.org/en/2006/05/205391.shtml
http://www.indymedia.org/en/2006/01/832203.shtml
http://bc.indymedia.org/feature/display/6774/index.php
http://www.indymedia.org/en/2004/12/866082.shtml


[ref]=[http://mke.indymedia.org/en/2006/09/206219.shtml]

1 comment - Leave a comment

Aug. 28th, 2006 11:49 am

Here's my rant about last nite's Emmy ceremony.
But first this short bit of autobiographical crap:

It's not a war on terrorism, it's a war on journalism.

Greetings, and salutations. It's Sunday afternoon, the
27th of August. 2006 is just flying by, ennit?
It's pretty rainy too. I rode bike while it was just
cloudy, chilly and a tiny bit windy. Then it turned.
I'm ducked inside a Tim Horton's coffeeshop taking
cover before my final half mile or so home.
I wouldn't mind this, but I took my laptop along
with me in my Bihn bag, so I'll worry about wetness
the whole time. Just how waterproof IS this bag, it's
pretty new to me (I bought it from Firefox! And it sure
is a looker.) and I'm not confident so I have a big
white plastic trashbag tucked inside that I can wrap
up the box with, eh?
So check it out. I'm typing to you on winXp right
now, but some of this zine's going to be composed
using the Breezy Badger build of Ubuntu LinUx.
Neat! Thanks go out to my mentor, Mr. Cygnus
for that. He's going to help me surpass the usual
sound card and wifi problems that still haunt most
*nix installs still to this day. I think the only
complete installs I've ever been able to do on my
own so far have been Caldera 2.3, 2.4 and Redhats
5.1 and 6.0
Yuck. Two builds I don't like very much. I almost
made it all the way with a SUSE 9.0 on a 400mhz
machine but alas, soundcard trubs again. oh well.
That's news from the underground, er, the underwhere?
Underwear. Underthere. Notes from the underwater.
Yeah, that's it.

http://www.edubuntu.org


OK, here's my rant about last nite's Emmy Award Ceremony.

TO TIVO OR NOT TO TIVO: That Is The Television
by marco


"...podcasting and other new..."

AND NOW LIVE FROM IN FRONT OF THE TELEVISION
IT'S YOUR PRIMEANARCHIST GUIDE TO THE EMMY
AWARd CEREMONIES.


So, House tells the 40 Year Old Virgin that
Chloe is a teen schoolgirl who can help
Keifer get Conan a gig on the Emmys just
as long as he doesn't say a word about South
Park.

I think that about covers all of it.

"...and Mel Gibson has a new series on Al
Jazeera."

Nice. Real nice. Sweet joke Conan. There's
something really endearing about Conan. The
first time I ever saw him on late nite I must
tell you I thought he was a major nazi. It's
those Aryan cheekbones, and that blonde shock
of Reaganite hairstuffs up top. Boyee was I
wrong. I gave him a second thought when my
friend Staci (formerly of Green Bay area)
told me she had a wicked crush on him and
thought he was the greatest. Something tells
me he's a good guy. My apologies for first
impressions, eh?

Taxes on gift baskets. Yup. Hand me something
and it's income.

"unlike the good old days when they just got up
and left the room. Ay yay yay. Yikes." Go Conan,
go Conan go Conan go.

Desperately Seeking Megan Mulally. Yup, Will,
Grace and the Housewife from hell.

Am I the only one who thinks 24 has been the only
television three years running that's worth NOT
setting your TIVO to skip??

Target. Expect more, but keep your boxes, receipts,
and bags around somewhere so you can return the
more defective ones you bought. Yeah, their tag
line really should be "Expect less, return more."
Or TARGET: Product More; Quality Control Less.

I really wish the Emmys would replay the Sprint
Crime Deterrent commercial from the Superbowl,
don't you?

Your Wireless connection is most important, that's
why you should pay up to break your 2 year contract
with Verizon and try Cingular for a while. Oops, did
I say that?

I

Did.

Yup.

And now, here's Martin and Charlie Sheen for that wet look
and the stiff upper lip. Where's Emilio when you're missin'
family!

Insert the name of a TV show here: [ ] that stinks so
bad even some Febreze.com won't save it.

The Segway podium was a nice touch. I think Conan's
going to pull this off. This is a fun ceremony.
Now, Laborday's coming soon. So get out there and
Shop, SHOP, S H O P ! ! !


No offense, Barry Cantelope, I mean, Manilow; but I
think about when you start singing I might have to
TIVO you until Heidi Klum comes on. I've already seen
your stuff on about 5 talk shows the past few months
and it's like following a bad comedian around for a
few weeks in a row. Or even a good comedian. Yup.
you drink extra and you hope to hear that one different
joke s/he decided to add and replace with that one
other one.

Ah, the doublestuff oreo. A Black and white cookie
being eaten in a black and white squad car, by
black and white cops. How come the film didn't roll
in just black and white. I guess color is just too
important in commercials, huh?

Deal,

or

no

deal.


Oh Conan, making fun of Telemundo. Nice.
Oh Neat, Daily Show and Colbert Report through a
40G ipod. Neat, neat, neat. Ooh, and the Palm
Treo 700. Talk about your product placement.
But I digress. Jon Stewart. Yippie!!!




Snakes

On

A

Plane.

Aaron Spieling (sp.)


Never mind, I think I'll TIVO Simon Coward and
turn it on after Barry Cantelope's done right?


If you think getting a full dose of fruits is
amazing, don't just taste it, savor it. Savor
cingular's all over network has the fewest
drops of vanilla in their lattes.

Or

Something

Like

That.



Earl is the name of my office.

Did Simon Cowell get booed or what? Um, did he
pay people to boo him maybe? I wouldn't put it
past that frogger. I mean flogger, I mean buckeroo,
er, uh, I mean Bugger.


We're hear in 43rd street, right in the heart
of hooker heaven. Oops, I mean Times Square.

Wow, Dick Clark looks and sounds bad, but at the
same time he looks and sounds great. Do you know
what I mean? If you know what he's been going through
with stroke and all, trying to relearn English and
motorskills, etc., you can tell by watching him,
(if you're patient enough) that he really IS alert
and with it. Yup. I don't like him, but I kind of
do like him. Know what I mean? Yeah, something like
that.

Chocolate.

Everybody

Loves

Chocolate.

And Raymond, and MacDonalds, huh? I spelled it
wrong, didn't I? Good. Won't show up on ask.com
or google if I can pull of not saying it anywhere
else too. hehehehe

Excuse me, that ATM just ate my card, and I have
to be at Chrysler's German headquarters in 35 minutes,
could you go behind the machine and do that thing
you do again?

And now, here's Prime Anarchist with Alliterative
Headline Of The Hour.

CRONKITE TO CROWN COURIC QUEEN OF CBS NEWS. Couric.
Is she any relation to Times Courier? Roman? ASCII.

Yeah.

That's

The

Ticket.


Is Barry Manilow a perfect excuse to use the word
Yutz or what?

And what's with pretending to Torture Bob Newhart in
the isolation booth thingie? Was that Alan Dershowitz
idea or something?

So is paradigm the word of the week or what? I guess
better that than meme, eh? or Podcast. Did I say that?
Yeah. Did.

Bradley Whitford, Didn't he sing for Aerosmith? Or
play bassoon or something? Or was that Halford?
Judas KISS? Buffoon. Yeah, that's it. I was right.
Sorta. Yeah.

By the way, did I ever tell you why I never buy
Arrow Shirts, Van Heusens?

So Labour Day is coming soon. Get out there and
Start your shopping. Shop shop shop!!!

Ladies and Gentlemen, here's Howie Mandel and
a woman with cleavage all the way down her cleavage
for the all new subtle-porn-oriented weekly show
entitled "Feel Or No Feel."

"Peppered? Mr. Whittington, seasoned to an inch of his life."
-- Jon Stewart


Ladies and Gendarmes, the 58th primetime battle of
wits with unarmed opponents. NBC's NFL with NVideo
nUnit and dividing by 'n' when you can't divide by
'0.' Ah, making n, n - n. Now there's a quickfix.

Neat.

But I digress.

Can you say obfuscating the emmies?

Well you can on a 7 second delay that's for sure.

So, what do you get when you nUnit test your FSCK
on an Apt/Get while compiling a kernel? Yup. Corporate
media.

At this time I would like to thank the RIAA and the
MPAA for royally screwing up all things creative in
the first place. Can you say suppress? Suppressant,
Repression, Suppression. Yeah, that's that. I'll stop
right there.

Yes, "Little Miss Sunshine" ads on the Emmys. That's
wicked cool. What a movie that one was. Get to it,
or GET it as soon as you can. Worth the admission at
any price, in my NOT SO HUMBLE opinion.

So, did Heather Locklear ever do Aaron Spelling?
OK, just pretend I never asked that. How old was
she?

Watching life through Aaron Spelling's eyes is
kind of like watching Clerks II.

"I'm disgusted and repulsed and I can't look away."
Becky played by Rosario Dawson watching a man do
it with a male donkey named Kelly. Or was the man
named Kelly?

Now THAT'S television.


Ooh la la.

I don't think I've eaten oreo cookies (fresh OR stale)
in a couple years. I must do that soon. And yes, my
favorite way to eat them is still as stale is you
can get them.

How's Bob Newhart doing? I haven't seen him in
quite a while. Is he ok? I worry about him. Jon
Stewart said he was going to kill him.


"It warps the minds of our children and weakens
the resolve of our allies."
-- Stephen Colbert


Use tools, feel human. Photoshop everything you
can't TIVO. Yeah, that's the ticket. Ready, set,
lick. The victim has been cut in half.

I'm serious. Is Bob Newhart OK? I really wanna
know. I think the TV spinoff of Snakes On a Plane
really should be Tarantulas On A Train. Yeah, I'll
produce it. OK?

Aaron Spelling couldn't be here tonite so we
accept this award on Carrie Goldwyn and her
psycho mom. Ooops. Did I say that? Sure I,
knew I could.

You were warned never to push Jessica Biel to the
limits. Now you must face the evil consequences.
FBI, IRS, John Gotti and Paris Hilton.

Yeah, growing up Motolla. Hey, did Jessica ever...


Calista Flockhart announced she almost went
"ass over tits." Harsh morbid joke alert:
Maybe she started out on the wrong runway!

"Jessica, for the next two years, I own you."
-- Aaron the slavedriver.

So am I the only one out there who has a crush
on Stockart Channing? I doubt it.


Julia Dreyfus, is she related to... did she ever do...

Never mind.

This is the first Emmy win, and 9th nomination for
some obscure guy who worked his ass off for many
years and seldom got a break because his opinion
was so outspoken.

Target: Love The Skin You're In. Don't stop livin'
in the red. Just 8 shopping days til Laborday.
So steal your dad's debit card if you gotta, and
get out there and shop, shop shop!!!

Oh, good.

[WIPE BROW] Bob Newhart is ok.

I'm proud to call you my mealticket.

And I mean that more ways than one!

Say, did Tori ever...

Uh, never mind. I don't want to know.

Happy Emmys.


-30-

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